Not Of This World

I got in a really bad car wreck today. Slammed into a guardrail and totaled my car. The only injuries I sustained were a bruised wrist, and minor lacerations on my right hand. It’s a miracle I’m alive. God continues to bless me with miracles of life when I should honestly be dead.

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I’m here to offer my insight (as much as that may be worth).

Also, I would love it if you guys came to me with prayer requests. 
:D 

 I want to know who you are
Even if you’re falling apart
Reach in and touch your scars
And all the shame you’ve kept in your heart

‘Cause it’s not enough
it’s not enough
just to say that we’re okay
i need your hurt i need your pain
it’s not love any other way

‘Cause I already know who you are
And all things that kept us apart
So reach in and touch My scars
and know the price I paid for your heart. 

God says, BREAK MY HEART FOR WHAT BREAKS YOURS!!! 
Why? 
Because He loves you. That’s why. 

And I don’t mean that constant sort of loneliness or yearning for another person. I mean that deep, very alone kind of feeling. 

The kind of feeling where no one will be able to see into your heart to feel your hurt.

They can say they understand or that they can relate. But no one can truly know. 

But God knows.

And God hurts too.

So take it to him. Because he truly understands.

I’m so tired.

And I just can’t shake it.

I’m tired in my bones, and in my mind, and in my heart.

And I just can’t rise up right now.

All the posts about people breaking up and complaining about a boyfriend or a girlfriend or being heart broken over someone. 

That feeling like you’re going to die? That feeling that aches all-over? The feeling that life could not possibly go on like this. That there can only be nothingness.

That’s how I feel about my GOD. 
That’s how I feel when I think about what we DID TO HIM.
That’s how I feel when I think about His sacrifice for us.
That’s how I feel when I think about the fact that He loves me even though I spat in His face, and lied to Him, and hid from Him, and told Him that His gift was garbage, and destroyed His temple, and forgot about Him, and hated Him, and joined in the fight against Him, and used His name as a curse, and that I do these things STILL without even thinking about it. That I CONTINUALLY am a SINNER. 

That’s how I feel when I know that He makes me BLAMELESS, SPOTLESS, PERFECT

when I deserve to rot in hell. 

That’s why I can’t talk to Him without crying, without screaming and wailing and sobbing.

Because I deserve to be put to DEATH. I deserve to SUFFER FOREVER.
He was PERFECT. He did
NOTHING.

And He put that on Himself. 

If you’ve never been TORN APART inside over the fact that Jesus Christ loves you,

YOU DON’T KNOW LOVE.

2. Reblog if you have ever called someone something negative, whether it be to their face or behind their back.

Take a day to think of all the mean things anyone has ever said to you, or any names that anyone has called you. Think of how awful you felt. Think of how hurt your heart was. Why do you even remember all these mean things? BECAUSE THEY FELT ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE.

Now, think of all the mean things you ever said to anyone else, and all the negative names you have ever used to describe another person. I bet you can’t remember them all. But, I bet more than one person felt ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE because of it.

THINK before you SPEAK.